Archive for November 2012

Sooo Shallow   Leave a comment

I think at some point I am going to write a book on how facebook has changed my life. I learn new things about myself and others almost every time I log on. I saw a status update recently that almost prompted me to reply and most likely offend/lose a friend. Not cool JB, not cool. So instead I decided to direct my frustration at the post into a blog and hopefully give it quite a bit more thought power than a simple, “Hey, you are stupid and here are 5 reasons why!”

To be honest, I really wanted to blog because as I applied more thought process to the status update I realized some things that I was kind of surprised at.

Ok so let us start with the status update… It more or less stated that a certain gender as a whole is “shallow” because *the facebook staus updater* receives more attention now that he/she has lost weight but he/she has not changed in personality so he/she has no respect for people who would give attention to someone who has lost weight. I literally started talking out loud to myself after reading the update. And then wrote a comment to them. Then deleted the comment. Then went to bed to try to wrap my head around the whole thing. I need to do that more often because my first response is almost never the best response.

So this person is frustrated because after they made themself more attractive they were getting more attention. I know that isn’t what they were thinking but that’s the truth of the matter.

You see, somewhere along the road attractiveness on a physical level got a bad wrap. Let me point something out. Even the most self righteous of us do many many things that expend much of our time on being physically attractive. Yeah I know, I can hear your thoughts, and that you just said “not me!” to your computer screen.

Those jeans that you bought- you thought they were physically attractive and looked physically attractive on you and either increased your physical attractiveness or minimized your un-attractiveness. When able, we pick out a car that is physically attractive. We have a favorite color that directs our choices of physical things. We make our hair look as physically attractive as possible before leaving in the morning and I would argue that you might do that again at other times during the day. You get a tan because it is physically attractive. Every piece of clothing you have is based in its attractiveness to you and then your attractiveness in it. You went to the gym and lost the weight because you didn’t like yourself with the weight. In other words you were not physically attracted to yourself.

All attraction to other humans starts with physical attraction. The physical side of it may fade in importance at times but it is still there and cannot be removed. Sexual attraction is hugely impacted by physical attraction and some people are probably reading this and asking themselves if there is a difference in the two.

You choose pets by level of physical attraction. We admire babies because of physical attraction. I understand that pets and babies exceed physical attraction, but it is there.

All of the entertainment industry is built on physical attraction and in most all of the advanced, industrialized world lean-ness is more physically attractive than fatness.

All of your favorite tv shows are made up of handpicked physically superior people. The same goes for movies. Unless humor is the goal, physical attractiveness powers the industries of entertainment, retail, fashion, fitness, music, sports, and every day interaction at every level.

So you made yourself more attractive to yourself but you are angry because you also made yourself more attractive to others as well. That sounds like someone struggling to find some self worth. So I got angry at the statement of someone who has a low self esteem. I wanted to address their stupid statement that was made out of their low self worth. Shame on me.


Posted November 12, 2012 by john b in philosofickle

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BMHL Hockey In Your Face   Leave a comment

I have been subbing in the Batavia Men’s Hockey League (BMHL). It is pretty much a dream come true. I have been working for this chance for about 4 years now. Around here there isn’t much else to do with any hockey aspirations, other than pickup hockey late at night with less-than-motivated skaters.

Since the BMHL is organized, and they actually keep score, and there is a player ranking based on skill and speed, I wanted to be in it. The BMHL would provide an unbiased gauge of my progress, and would continually track it from year to year. So a guy breaks his leg, and I am in while he heals. 6-8 weeks. Hopefully next season I will have a full time position.

Lessons I am learning…

I had no idea how physical it would be. Don’t get me wrong, I am a physical player, and I love bumping and such, but these guys play hard and dirty.

I like bumping shoulders. They like hitting you with their stick, and fists, and elbows. This week an older player looked me in the eye and cross-checked me in the facemask with his stick. When that had no effect he used his gloved fist. When that had no effect he did it again. I skated away when play moved to the other end of the ice. Obviously I have new rules to learn.

The thing is, it doesn’t hurt. None of it hurts. Any part of me that could be hurt by any part of another player is covered with padding, helmet, or cage. But it sure gets your blood boiling. Try it sometime. When you are in a heated discussion, debate, or argument, apply a light blow to the other persons face. See what happens. Do it to a stranger too. Just for the sake of science.

We won the game. Had we not been winning, or had no chance of winning, I probably would have shown the nice man what happens when his slow, old, fat, weak self meets an object about 6 inches taller, stronger and much faster.


I still haven’t decided if it is best to show that I can’t be goaded into physical response. Still haven’t found if lack of response will just encourage more abuse. Still learning the league and its ways.

Ah, the BMHL. I love it so far, and I hate it thus far. Still figuring out how I fit in and I don’t want to do anything that will jeopardize my ability to fit in.

Posted November 12, 2012 by john b in hockey

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Bruno the Huge   Leave a comment

I had an appointment today with a gentleman named Bruno. Bruno came to me years ago to start training to become big and muscular. The he stopped coming after about 4 sessions. And now he is back.

Bruno is not all there. I don’t think he is even mostly there. Probably about 50% there. And now he is here wanting to be huge.

I am 6 ‘ 2, 205 lbs. Bruno is 6 ft, 147 lbs. Bruno is very, VERY small. And crazy.

He talks about the military. He said was in the military, and often refers to basic training. Today, while doing the bench press, he said it was the military that taught him to breathe correctly while lifting. He was actually correct regardless of how he came upon the information. 

Then he said, “black cops don’t quit”. 

I thought that was an odd statement to make while lifting. Bruno isn’t black, and  Bruno isn’t an officer of the law.

Then I realized he said “Black-Ops don’t quit”. Ahhh… like xbox. Silly me. Of course, video games don’t quit.

Bruno is one of those guys that I just know is spinning my wheels. He is a waste of time. He won’t continue and he won’t ever be muscular. He won’t even be average.

I was very tempted to put him out of his misery by putting him into his misery. Meaning, I would work him hard enough that, when he wakes up tomorrow morning, he will feel like his rotund wife had been jumping up and down on him all night long. Second appointment? Doubtful.

Bruno’s wife is very small. She is 5 ft tall and about the same width as she is high. She wants to lose weight. But she doesn’t want to work out. I sympathize with her and put her on a bike for 20 minutes. She barely made it. Barely. But I was proud of her and gave her a high five. And Bruno said he was proud of her and suggested they go to Wendy’s for cheeseburgers. And he wasn’t kidding. His logic was that a cheeseburger isn’t bad once in a while. I agreed with him but then flatly commented that what his wife will eat following her first ever workout to lose weight probaly should be something leaner. He said, “Like what?” I said, “You can’t think of anything?” Bruno makes me want to slap my forehead. Actually, Bruno makes me want to slap Bruno’s forehead.

This all sounds very mean. I don’t want to be mean. It is the facts of being a trainer. Sometimes you just know when a client is a complete waste of time and energy.

I wish he would stick with it though. With a name like Bruno he really should be a tough guy.

Posted November 6, 2012 by john b in oh ssstop